loss

the first night we were home was a rough one. not only was i up most of the night with a very awake and jet lagged 12 week old, i also got news that my cousin nick had died suddenly and tragically. i guess it was ok that my daughter was awake and just wanted to play, i wouldn't have been able to sleep anyway, not with such a heavy heart.

words cannot express how sorry i am for my aunt julie, and her other son, ross. i can't even imagine what they are both going through. there was never a time that i talked to my aunt, and she didn't tell me how proud of her son(s) she was. she would always go on about all their recent accomplishments and what responsible young men they were growing into. they were (are) such a strong family, the three of them, and they had been through a lot together. i know that they will continue to be, even through this tragedy.

experiencing death really opens your eyes to the reality of life, and how fleeting it is. it is just as the bible says, "a vapor in the wind". especially when you are only days away from being 21 years old. today would have been his 21st birthday.

our family get togethers won't ever be the same, not only because of nicks absence, but also because of the sadness that will forever be in our family's eyes. he will be missed, to say the least, but he will definitely never, ever, be forgotten.